Holy shit. It's been three years since I've been here, and I wouldn't have came back if I didn't run upon Mimsy's through myspace.

Let's see... I'm now 24. Mother of three- ages 6, 4, and 3. Wife of one, with whom I'll celebrate 7 years of marriage on Sunday.

We bought a house.

I became a photographer.

And we have a pug, 7 fish, and 2 hermit crabs. :D

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Yesterday I felt the overwhelming urge to be productive, so I spent the biggest part of the day cleaning house. I cleaned every room in the house from top to bottom. And if that wasn't enough, I loaded up all three kids and took them to town by myself.

I started my anti-depressants yesterday. So far, so good. I'm starting to feel content. I'm not bursting at the seams with happiness, but I'm not sad and angry either. The little things aren't bothering me anymore. And I like it that way.

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We can get a loan. But we can't get a doublewide. And no decent house is in the price range we can afford (unless it's 2 bedrooms and that just totally fucks the purpose of getting a bigger house!) Life just fucking sucks.

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I have the tendency to just leave things hanging. Just like right here... I write once and then totally forget about it. Hmm... let's see here.

I had therapy twice last week. The first was a scheduled appointment and the second was rather unplanned. Both, however, have left me feeling a little better with myself. DH says that I know what my problems/issues are, I just need therapy to help me understand and cope with them.

I really don't know if I should be writing this or not... I'm afraid of jinxing things... but, we are going tomorrow to see about getting a house. We were already pre-approved through one company for a loan, but the intrest rate they were going to charge was outrageous. So tomorrow morning we're going to another company to see if we qualify. They have already told us (based on our credit score that I gave them) that our interest rate will only be about 1% higher than the current rates. I'm praying that things work out wonderfully at the company tomorrow. If we get approved, we're going to go to the real estate office and make an offer for a beautiful doublewide we've found. Once again, I'm doing alot of praying here. We want this loan and we want this house. Now to just hope that my prayers get answered.

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i suppose this is where i begin to ramble on about myself. but honestly, what's to say. i'm 21 years old. i'm married, and have been for 4 years now. i have three children. i am a high school dropout. i live in a tiny little piece of shit trailor. i'm unemployed. and i start therapy in just 3 days. yeah, i think that covers it all.

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